The Anatomy of a Chemist

What’s with mediocrity?

Seems like everything I do is mediocre— it doesn’t stand out. I’m sort of a little of everything. When I join in competetions, online or not, I’m always at the bottom or the second or something. I don’t get that Gold medal.

But I saw something, I saw sports. There was one day, my friends and I were talking about sports. What sports do you play? Which sports do you like most? Things like that. And then I had the chance to talk about the sports that I like and play. I really wanted to brag (‘cause I’m proud of it) about me having an MVP medal for Baskeball during my elementary days and me being a mythical six for Volleyball in the same year, me being a varsity player of Table Tennis for 2 years, me being able to defeat my upperclassmen during the first round of Table Tennis in my 1st year in high school, me having a gold medal for Table Tennis during my last year in high school. I really want to tell them that because those are the only things that, I believe, I’m ahead of them. But I can’t. I have to keep my feet on the ground at that time. I don’t want them to brand me as ‘mayabang’, ‘ma-ere’. Those sort of things.

Maybe in the near future I can showcase to them that I can excel. I cannot be a mediocre person anymore. I must go beyond my limits ‘cause I don’t want to be like this anymore.

A Little Too Not Over You

‘Tell me why
You’re so hard to forget
Don’t remind me
I’m not over it
Tell me why
I can’t seem to face the truth
I’m just a little too not over you’

I dreamt of him last night. I thought everything was over then, but after that dream, I realized that it really isn’t over yet. I dunno why. I JUST DON’T FREAKIN’ KNOW WHY!

Must keep myself busy again! Hahaha.

Emotionally Unstable

Okay. I suddenly got emotional again! I dunno what triggered this phenomenon to happen. Maybe the frustration and the disappointment brought about by the often postponement of an extremely important thing. Or maybe because I’m annoyed with what happened this morning. (I really had a bad temper.)

I just don’t know what’s happening to me right now. Hmmm.. Perhaps it’s because I didn’t cry on the last episode of Boys Before/Over Flowers. Usually I cry while watching the last episode of the series that I’m watching regardless of its genre (‘Cause I did cry at the last episode of Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion R2). That’s another option, I guess.

But then again, I guess it’s neither the abovementioned facts which triggered me to be this emotional.

I’m maybe just sleepy. Hehehe.

Too much for my sentiments. At least I now have an outlet to release all of these.

Anyway, I really miss them. I haven’t seem ‘em for a while.

Why is it so hard?

Why is it so hard to tell somebody or someone what you feel about something or them? Hmmm. I’m thinking why.

Still thinking.

ARGH!

Everything’s just so frustrating today.

1. Postponement of one important affair.

2. CRS = Crappy Registration Shit-stem. Everything’s just so screwed up here. Well, somehow.

I just wanna sleep off all of those but then my future depends on ‘em so gotta bear with it! Anyway, it’ll pay off someday. I know. I just know.

:D